Mums & Tots Round-up: Preparing siblings for a baby

Introducing the idea of a new baby to a sibling can be such a worry. You don’t want to make them feel pushed out or for them to resent their little brother or sister. If this is you right now then you are not alone, in fact I have had so many conversations around the subject with friends who have gone through the exact same dilemma. That is the thing about sharing stories – as mums we have so much experience to share and you just never know who you might help with something you have tried yourself. 

As a mum of 3 I have had to go through the process twice and it has caused me no end of worry. Each time I have given tremendous thought to it all, not wanting to overdo it too soon but equally not wanting to do too little to prepare them for such a huge change to their little world. Both times though, I have put simple measures in place and the result has been a positive experience for all involved.

One piece of advice stood out and each time it has worked. I have my mum to thank for that one as she did exactly the same for me when my sister came along. Always refer to the baby as ‘their baby‘ or ‘their brother or sister‘. That way the jealousy is reduced as the baby is theirs, not yours. Giving ownership has worked so well both times and meant that they have never shown any jealous tendencies.  

I asked the parent blogger community if they had any advice to share too and not surprisingly they came up trumps! First up is Mudpie Fridays with a post jam-packed with lots of tips for preparing them for the arrival of their little brother or sister. Clare has also written a follow-up post 4 weeks in, sharing how she helped her son cope once baby had arrived which is really useful. 

Raising Emily has made a great list of books to read with your child, a great way to help them understand the changes that are happening to your body and that a baby will be joining the family soon! 

Something that we have done both times is share the gender of the baby with the girls, we felt it helped them to get to know the little person growing inside their mummy’s tummy. I adore this video from Verily Victoria Vocalises where she shares the moment her daughter found out she’d be having a little brother. Just beautiful. 

When baby finally arrives it can be such an overwhelming time for little ones. Their whole world is turned upside down and suddenly this tiny little bundle is getting all of the attention. The Littlest Darlings shares a lovely idea for the older sibling – a gift bag full of little treats. That way, when baby is presented with gift upon gift, they know they were remembered too. 

Someone once said to me that it takes around 3 months for everything to settle back down into some sort of normality and I would have to agree. We are now 6 months in and the girls have accepted their little brother as part of the family and love him to bits. It is a huge adjustment and with a few steps in place to help them along the way, they will get there in the end. 

More baby advice

• Bumps & Babies Round-up: Siblings adjusting to a new baby
• Special Needs Round-up: What about the siblings?
• Adoption/ Fostering round-up: Adoption perspectives, frustrations and love
• SEND Round-up: learning, siblings and challenging behaviour