Adoption/ Fostering round-up: Adoption perspectives, frustrations and love

Welcome to the 2^nd Adoption/Fostering round-up. This month I have been pretty quiet on the blogging front myself but the upside of that is that I have had time to read and enjoy blog posts from the A/F community – thank you Twitter for making it so easy! My Favourites list is growing!

I feel it’s only fair to start with a poster who linked her blog to my 1^st round-up last month: pat on the back and round of applause for Dr Spouse!! (the rest of you – don’t be shy!). Dr Spouse writes about her experience of adopting  the now 6 month-old Baby Spouse  – who sounds so gorgeous and charming I’m hooked reading her blog already! Katie is a Developmental Psychologist which means she is able to bring some interesting titbits and contributions to adoption,  fostering and attachment chat, both on her blog and via Twitter.

Also this month I discovered TheOneHandMan who writes about his experiences of going through infertility, IVF and now, the adoption process. I find it very refreshing and full of hope – TheOneHandMan and his wife are Approved Adopters waiting for a Match and I wish them all the luck in the world and as short a wait as possible to becoming parents. As someone who has been through this process myself (and now embarking on it for a 2^nd time) I like to read about his experiences, not just because it’s the male perspective but because it reminds me of our own journey. It’s an honest and interesting read, seen through another’s eyes. This month he has been writing about Adoption Social Workers and Home Study – go check it out.

Lily is another blogger I have found lately who is on the path to adoption – as a single prospective adopter I take my hat off to her. Her blog ‘Turning I into FAM’I’LY’  is a personal and inspiring account  about life, relationships and trying to become a family. This month in particular she writes about her own experiences of the road to adoption so far – she has been experiencing a challenging process so far which I really feel is something that needs more understanding and support–  for her and for all others out there who are willing to lay themselves bare in order to adopt a child, particularly those brave enough to do it alone. Wish you all the best Lily, keep us posted and keep blogging!

Last month you may have heard that Martin Narey (Government Advisor for Adoption) opened a call for views on 2 very key areas of the Looked After Child (LAC) journey : that of contact with birth parents and a suggestion for possible sibling separation to speed up adoption matches.  His call for views can be found on the DfE site. Many posters have been blogging in answer to the call (I’ll be doing my own soon). Stix at The Boy’s Behaviour posts her response here – not only is it a brilliant, thoughtful and real response but amongst the many comments, Martin Narey himself has contributed! Oooh!

On a similar note Kat has from Kat_On_The_Edge has been blogging about her experiences of trying to adopt the sibling to her daughter. I know how frustrating, slow and bureaucratic this particular process is myself, as we are in a very similar position. Martin Narey will hopefully take note of this also when he considers the proposal for possible sibling separation (where appropriate). Some siblings are already separated – by turn of events, birth  or another reason – and yet have the opportunity to be (re)united with their brothers/sisters who are placed with existing Adopters.  This process needs urgent review, particularly when these Adopters are so recently approved and direct contact with siblings and their families would be so beneficial.  It just doesn’t have to be this slow, especially when there are children already involved in the prospective family. Lend Kat your support and check out her blog.

Last month we were a bit short on the ground on Fostering blogs but this time I am pleased to introduce Minnie, Mickey at Foster Adoption and their story of their family. Its diverse, light-hearted, compelling and you should really check it out. Minnie writes mostly about her foster children, Daffy and Donald and honestly accounts life with them, the challenges and the delights. I’m still looking for more Fostering blogs – please link them up below or let me know via Twitter. There’s so much to say on this important area and the difference fostering can make to a child’s life.

There’s plenty more brilliant pieces I could have included this month – I am astounded by the fantastic writing which comes out of the adoption/fostering community. The range of topics is varied, deep, light-hearted but most of all, so very child-centred.  Please do browse around each and every blog I mention, you will find some amazing pieces. I’d love to mention every single one here but I’d probably be writing from now until next month!  But for now I have to end with The Puffin Diaries, who I introduced for the first time last month and who has written a piece this month which almost made me cry. It’s the perfect piece to complete  this month’s round-up.  Sarah has managed to put down in words everything I feel and I know so many others do too. It’s heart-breaking, heart-felt, heart-warming, hopeful and amazing. Read ‘A Love Letter’ – you will love it.

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