SEND: Managing expectations and setting small goals

Ann at Rainbows Are Too Beautiful muses on ten years as a SEND parent and the incredible support and information she’s acquired from fellow SEND bloggers at BritMums including Jade at The Autism Page who has kindly guestwritten this month’s round-up.

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I can hardly believe another decade has past. Ten years ago I had no clue about SEND. I didn’t know any of the many acronyms that are now common place in my life.  I find much of the information and support I needed online and in my fellow SEND bloggers. 

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One of those is Jade, a full time mum to her two boys aged 6 and 4. After her eldest son was diagnosed with autism she began her blog to share information and resources to help other parents. This month she’s guest hosting our SEND round-up highlighting how our families’ New Year reflections can be a little different…

Every New Year we all take stock and reflect on the past and look towards the coming year. For many SEND families this can be challenge as our children are measured by expectations that do not take their differences into account.

Managing expectations as a SEND parent

Life as an SEND parent is not quite the life many of us imagined as Mummy Est.2014 explains in her post on adjusting our expectations. There are so many simple things that are different for SEND families, like  Riding on a Star who talks us through how different life can be by looking at her son’s birthday.  By Rights  from Downright Joy powerfully describes the expectations placed on our children. These expectations are one of the many reasons feeling overwhelmed is part of the day to day for many SEND families. In this post The Long Chain provides an honest and insightful look at being overwhelmed.

The importance of letting go

Thankfully, The Diary of a Not So Ordinary Boy explores how SEND families are often just about coping. It offers some great advice on wellbeing and how to cope.  Hunters Life provides more fantastic advice on how letting go of expectations can lead to a happier life.  This is something I totally agree with but it can be hard to do.

New Year lets us take stock of the past too and Steph’s Two Girls does this in her post about Siblings as does Rainbows are too Beautiful in a look back at 2019

Looking to the future

Whilst it is good to reflect on the past the best bit about a new year is looking forward. Thinking about our goals and what we want to change or improve in our lives. The Additional Needs Blog Father writes  about the changes we all need to make in 2020. Those small changes to support tackling climate change that we can all make are set out in the post Why 2020 Must Be The Year We Change For The Sake of Our Special Needs Children

Have you reflected on the past and made any plans for change in 2020?

You might also like:

SEND: How to cope with the stress and anxiety of change

10 podcasts to help you be a happy healthy mum

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About Ann .

“Rainbows are too beautiful,” said Anthony. “I just can’t look at them.” Ann says her son’s statement characterizes so much about how her autistic and neurotypical family interacts and interprets the world in their own wonderful way.

Originally a PR and marketing professional for the third sector, Ann now does some lecturing in this topic but spends most of her time being a full time mum and sharing her experiences through her award nominated blog. Ann’s three kids attend different schools and have multiple diagnoses including Autism, ADHD, anxiety and more. Ann is a Trustee on a local disabled children’s charity and speaks at SEND conferences and consultations.