So shops, advertisers and communication companies have four months to come up with a plan on how they intend to curb the sexualisation of children in advertising and marketing. The Prime Minister has asked the Bailey Review to officially look into the issue. But of course this topic has been popping up a lot in the media and among parents for a while now.
We’ve all heard of the infamous padded bra for preteens stocked by a high street shop as well as thongs for tweens. When I was at Alpha Mummy, I wrote about the 7 worst sexy toys for kids, which included a pole dancing kit, Playboy branded paraphernalia and overtly sexy dolls. But the sexualisation of children – really, they mean girls – isn’t just about the toys on offer. It’s the clothes that shops sell and that parents buy and the pervasive attitude that a “proper” girl is a “hot”, decorative one.
Libby Purves writes convincingly in the Times today that we need to look harder at the sexualisation of women in general to get at the root of the problem. Businesswomen strive to look foxy with power heels and nipped-in waists; female politicians’ clothes and hairstyles seem to get as much ink as their policies.
We all need – as my mother would say – an attitude adjustment.
David Cameron’s push to address the issue is a welcome move, especially if that promotes easier ways to block things like raunchy billboards near schools. (We once ate at a Pizza Express near our school’s playing fields, looking out on a giant billboard featuring 5 apparently topless women with bare, be-thonged bottoms. Appetising.)
But why is the Prime Minister suggesting the creation of a website explaining what parents can do if they see something inappropriate? Surely the government would do better to tap into the communities like BritMums that have been talking about these issues for ages? They should wade into the discussions already happening and engage with parents who want to act.
Girls have always aspired in some sense to look and act more grown-up than they are. (Check out this 1959 ad for “Just Like Mommie’s panty and bra set“. Creepy.) As individuals, we need to give them something less tarty and “hot” to aspire to, while maintaining a society that’s not just focused on breast size, dance moves stolen from strippers, and skin-tight fashion.
That means we have to quit thinking t-shirts with precocious slogans are “cute”. We should show shops that mini-me fashion mirroring adult styles keeps our pocketbooks firmly closed. We should resist the pressure to allow our daughters makeup and high heels and even suggestive music before they are old enough to understand it.
And if we see messages that we don’t like in advertising or magazines, we should complain. In the Guardian, Tanith Carey reports that the watchdogs have received relatively few official complaints – I’m betting because most parents feel helpless in face of the sexualised onslaught.
So here are 5 things I do, with my 7-year-old:
1. Only allow playing with makeup at home – no leaving the house with mascara’ed lashes or blue lids
2. Complain when I see inappropriate girls’ clothing. In the past I’ve just passed this by with a sinking feeling. Now I’ll let the store manager know how I feel about it.
3. Alert the appropriate watchdog about ads aimed squarely at adults that are seen by children – whether on billboards or before the watershed on TV.
4. Talk to my daughter about what these ads are trying to “say” and how one-dimensional they are.
5. Set down family rules about watching music videos and creating playlists. We’ll make this an activity we do together.
Cameron’s meeting at Downing Street in October is a good step. But it’s only a first step. We all have to be involved with the next ones.
— Jennifer Howze, www.jenography.net
About Jennifer Howze
Jennifer Howze is the Creative Director and co-founder of BritMums. She blogs about family travel at Jenography.net, tweets at @JHowze and Instagrams at @JHowze. Previously, she wrote the Alpha Mummy blog at The Times and as a journalist has contributed to The Times, The Guardian, The Independent, The Wall Street Journal, Travel & Leisure, Budget Travel, CNN.com, Allure, SELF and Premiere, among others. She won The Maggie Award from the Planned Parenthood Federation of America for a health article in Seventeen magazine.
Hill_wheeler
Thursday 9th of June 2011
Vanessa, I agree. We all have to take responsability. I think the point about the Bailey Report (or one of them) is that however hard you try and encourage your kids to grow up in their own time and to make the right decision, it's hard fighting against a tide in which it is considered "normal" for 2 year olds to wear high-heeled shoes etc. And it gets harder as kids get older and the pressure to act grown-up intensifies.
Ruth
Wednesday 8th of June 2011
I think this article takes a very sensible view of the Bailey Report, http://carolinefarrow.com/2011/06/06/the-bailey-review/ Though the link to the Education Department is wonky, here it is, http://education.gov.uk/inthenews/inthenews/a0077662/bailey-review-of-the-commercialisation-and-sexualisation-of-childhood-final-report-published
Jacquie
Tuesday 7th of June 2011
Hello, I quite like the rules, especially the ones about complaining. It's a bit like excess packaging at the check-out, undo the packaging there so they deal with it, putting the problem back in their court. I have to say though, as I mentioned in a recent post, that the question is if retailers are feeding or creating a demand. I think a little bit of both as you lead to by the attitude adjustment. Not that it should take the retailers off the hook though! Jacquie
Bumbling
Tuesday 7th of June 2011
OK, so Moo is only 2 and I have a long way to go on this... But I put on make up every day when I'm going to work. Moo often sits with me, plays with the brushes. I let her play with the powder - it's white, what's the harm... But then she says she wants the powder, wants to look pretty. I must have said something at some point about mummy wanting to look pretty, I guess. How do we explain those simple things - why do we wear make-up (for those of us that do...)? Why is the way we look naturally not good enough? The outside influences at present I can somewhat shield Moo from. But how do I deal with the contradictions in my own life?
Vanessa
Monday 6th of June 2011
The key issue for me is not about looking to a third party (be it the government / ad agencies / shops / etc) to solve the problem but for ME to take responsibility for how I raise my daughter(s). The buck stops with ME. I need to teach her right from wrong and what is or isn't acceptable dress/grooming/behaviour/etc. I am the one who has to pay for her clothes etc so if I deem them unacceptable she won't get them. (Ok, so my daughter is only 2 right now, but I've thought ahead!). I was utterly shocked and disgusted while at the gym recently that a tot who had been swimming with us, then got dolled up in high heel shoes to leave. THE MOTHER bought those!! What is wrong with these people?