Do we really need ‘Me time’?

Credit: Linco Press

Jana Bakunina knows a thing about ‘me time’ and how to make the most of it. She recognises that to be a woman to impress you have to have a little me time too, hear her thoughts on how to make the most of yours.

This week I came across an article in a women’s magazine criticising the concept of “me time”.  The author boxed “me time” into sipping a glass of Sauvignon Blanc whilst taking a bubbly bath or having a cup of low-calorie hot chocolate instead. She thought it was a ludicrous concept, related to women’s hormonal timings. Personally, I don’t think there is anything wrong with a relaxing bath, a mug of rich and gooey full-fat hot chocolate or a drink. What’s more, I’d like to pick a bone over the subject matter in general.

Before you have a family, “me time” isn’t even noteworthy. You are in charge and you are the priority. However, once you have a family, “me time” becomes a precious commodity, an unattainable fantasy, like a picture of a sandy beach and turquoise sea on a remote island far, far away. Quite simply, juggling career, family and home chores balances “me time” out altogether.

Yet, women need time to think, reflect, develop and grow as personalities, husbands, children and corporate ladders notwithstanding. We need space to be ourselves, discover new interests and passions, appreciate little things like a piece of delectable chocolate cake served in a local café or bigger things like stillness and mindfulness.

For me, “me time” is about independence of mind, learning experiences, time to discover myself. For Jane it is about going to an exhibition in a British Museum, for Zara is about finding inspiration for her new art project, for Sasha it is finding time for spirituality.

Since starting Ladies Who Impress, I have been asking women, coming to my events, for their feedback on meeting female role models and hearing their stories. My guests have been getting inspired by brilliant artists, scientists, athletes, businesswomen, but it’s not their successes that mattered most. It was their down-to-earth attitude, their very relatable stories and genuine vulnerabilities. Coming to a Ladies Who Impress event has become a ritual of quality “me time”, where women don’t judge or get judged but relate to someone else’s experience and reflect upon their own journeys.

So I think “me time” is important. It is up to a woman how she uses it, of course. I’d say: “Be bold about it.” Put something into your diary, book an event, go out. It is much harder to negotiate finding time for yourself whilst at home when family and housework are bound to take priority. Making an occasional commitment to go to an art gallery, watch an indie film or enrolling in a day course will end up tilting the bargaining power in your own books in your favour. Invest time in yourself and everyone will benefit. My thoughts on “me time” – yes, please!

Russian-born Jana Bakunina is the founder of Ladies Who Impress, a forum celebrating female role models and inspiring other women to make the most of their talents. The next celebration takes place on Friday, 4 October. Details & tickets at Ladies who Impress

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