A resolution to make more time for yourself

New Year’s resolutions – one month on. How are you getting on? Serra Kerrigan from Martini Mum has been having a little think about why we are sometimes unsuccessful with the goals we set ourselves and has come up with some top advice to make more time for yourself in 2014.

By now many New Year’s resolutions have fallen by the wayside. The reason for this is that most resolutions involve removing something from your life that you really enjoy. The key to resolution success is to add something rather than remove, and I believe that something should be a little more me time.

Becoming a parent changes your life; the things you do, the way you feel, the way you look – there is not much that’s left unchanged. It goes without saying that the shift in perspective is wonderful, terrifying, and game changing. No wonder so many mums are in danger of completely losing themselves during the transition. You come up for air and can’t remember the last time you finished a book or held an adult conversation. In short, you’ve lost touch with the wider world: music, art, fashion etc. As obvious as this all sounds it can be a real struggle to prioritise yourself within the demands of the everyday. But I believe it’s important you put yourself first sometimes, because when you’re happy and relaxed you have so much more to give.

Here are my golden me time rules to set you on your way….

Schedule some time every week into the family diary where you get to do one thing for yourself. Whether it’s yoga on a Tuesday evening, an hour pottering around the shops on a Saturday morning, or an undisturbed half an hour in the bathroom on a Sunday afternoon. It does’t have to take long – it just has to be regular.
Make the most of your time at home. Just because you don’t go out as much as you used to doesn’t mean that you can’t make an evening in feel special. Try at least one evening without the TV. You could arrange a play date with your partner (think Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway playing chess in the Thomas Crown Affair). Or, if you’re on your own, stick on a yoga DVD, light a candle, and breathe. Even something as simple as promising not to touch the housework and choosing instead to pour yourself a large glass of pinot and skype faraway friends will refresh you. If time is limited listen to one of our playlists while you get on with stuff and discover some new music. (www.martinimum.com/playlists/)
Treat yourself. It doesn’t have to be expensive, it could be a chocolate bar that’s not for sharing, or a lovely face mask for that undisturbed half hour in the bathroom.
Bribe your friends and family, they come in useful if you want a night out without a curfew or a night away. So why not treat them? From baking a cake to buying a hamper, unexpected gifts are a sure-fire way to earn brownie points you can cash in later.
Hire a baby sitter for the daytime. Treat yourself to a long lunch or an event with friends or a partner on a Saturday afternoon, soooo decadent.
Reward yourself – you do an amazing job as a mum and you deserve a little reward, I call it Champagne Friday!

Do you get enough me time? What’s your secret? What do you do with it?

Serra Kerrigan is the founder of Martini Mum the website dedicated to helping mums make the most of their me-time and, specifically, to remind them that it’s okay to put themselves first once in a while. Tweet with Serra @Martini_Mum

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